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 No.21977

ciuil uar

>imperials impose talos worship on skyrim

>get cucked by nazi elves
>get paid tons of gold for accepting white-gold concordat
>outlaw the religion that they imposed
>get a popular uprising
>mfw

>nords get their based native culture replaced by the imperial cult

>empire then prohibits worshipping a key deity in that cult
>make stormcloaks
>stormcloaks fight for their right to worship foreign deities
>native religion worshipping Shor and Tsun is almost never referenced
<this is because someone at bethesda thought a nordic pantheon would be too complicated for people coming from oblivion

down gourd
>become vampire hunter
>see vampire with elder scroll
>kiss her feet, simp for her and bring her back to her ancient vampire daddy
>she became a vampire thousands of years ago in a death-rape ritual with Molag Bal that only a few survived
>still acts like a bratty teenager
>install mod that pretty much removes anything related to dawnguard unless you seek it out
>never play it ever again

arf ire
>buy property rights in the middle of fucking nowhere
>build based self sufficient homestead
>make Lydia take care of the household
>adopt kids
>random giant spawns and kills everyone
>still better than dawnguard

dragonporn
>only dlc i finished recently
>no fucking idea what the story is even after i finished it
>my favorite dlc
>bethesda black magic

<didn't pay a single penny for any of this

<nexus hoes mad

 No.21985

<outlaw the religion that they imposed
<get a popular uprising
Akschually more like ban it but not actually enforce it then have based reachman uprising that fucks shit up with Ulfric involved causing the ban to be actually enforced and then the civil war happens

 No.21986

>>21985
>Akschually more like ban it but not actually enforce it then have based reachman uprising that fucks shit up with Ulfric involved causing the ban to be actually enforced and then the civil war happens

for the 4 people halfway interested in the lore:
>Markath belongs to reachmen
>they launch rebellion in Markarth
>establish rogue kingdom
>former jarl wants that shit back
>make a deal with Ulfric
>promise free talos worship
>Ulfric and the city militia do a little trolling(ethnic and political cleansing)
>The 4E176 "Markarth Incident"
>high elves see it as violation of concordat and it leads to the civil war

100 years later the nords invent computers and internet
>be me
>go on 4nord.org
>look at first thread
>"Ulfric did nothing wrong"
>mfw

 No.21988

>>21986
Queue "Markarth incident never happened can't ferment 200l of mead in a week"
Unrelated but still find it funny the dragonborn propably kills more than half of Markarth's population if you do all the quests

 No.21989

>>21988
I never got to do the Markarth questline. I remember you had to go to prison to progress but I had -100% destruction spell cost enchants, killed all of the guards and got a bounty in the negative ten thousands. I didn't get the memo

 No.21990

>>21989
Yeah on the first playthrough I just went postal as well because I thought the game would make the guards surrender after getting slaughtered but no. Thankfully I already had the f5 before doing anything reflex.

 No.21991

>Nords
>Natives

Literal genocidal settler colonial invaders that should be sent back to Atmora, by force if necessary

 No.21993

>>21991
>Literal genocidal settler colonial invaders
<TES lore rabbit hole

atmora be like
>frozen wastes
>no sign of human life

>be nord

>immigrate south to escape the literal arctic
>meet snow elves, name a place in their honor
>befriend elves
>live happily in Saarthal
>have a population boom
>elves start genociding you because they see you as a threat now
>"Night of Tears" incident
>only two survive
>they go back to Atmora
>bring back a war fleet and btfo snow elves
>The Return
Snow elves are my favorite type of elf in TES, shame Ysgramor turned them into hostile NPCs instead. Luckily I can install a mod to make them passive

 No.21994

>>21993
small correction:
<be atmoran, not nord
nords evolved from atmorans due to a cultural/political shift

 No.21996

oh boy time to post some gripes
>character's race is 100% irrelevant to stormcloak storyline despite racism being their entire motivation
I mean at least add some extra steps to things because they don't trust your ass. Maybe a random encounter where a stormcloak soldier tries to kill you because they suspect you're a spy. You can go with the "you're one of the good ones" concept, but you shouldn't have to read that into the narrative, it should actually be in the story.
>you are forced to engage in the civil war content eventually by the main quest
this is wack, just let the shit be separate and stop trying to force the lame quests on people. it's not like you can play the game for long without getting civil war quest hooks
>major quest prompts dumped on you early on
at least dawnguard has a minimum level before giving you the quest hook
how the fuck do the Miraak cultists already arrive as soon as you get down from the mountain? they had to hear about the Greybeards calling you, which would take a while to get to them in Solstheim, and then they had to travel all the way to the middle of Skyrim.
>Bleak Falls Barrow sucks
it's obligatory if you want to get any dragon souls and it's just boring and too long for how little it offers. The bandits stealing the claw had potential to be kind of interesting but other than Arvel the Swift none of them have any detail.

>>21989
>most quests don't have an alternate way to complete
The fact that the game ever once has a "supposed to lose" fight when you could encounter those guards at level 100 or whatever and maxed out every skill is extremely stupid. This is made worse by the few quests that do have alternatives like the dark brotherhood where you are supposed to magically know that you have a choice this time.

 No.21997

>>21996
>how the fuck do the Miraak cultists already arrive as soon as you get down from the mountain?
at least its not a dark brotherhood assassin attacking you as soon as you take a smoke break after getting off a bot

 No.21998

>>21996
>I mean at least add some extra steps to things because they don't trust your ass
Shitty frost wraith quest should only be for non-nords or for imperials/high elves
>how the fuck do the Miraak cultists already arrive as soon as you get down from the mountain
they fast travel
>>Bleak Falls Barrow sucks
>it's obligatory if you want to get any dragon souls and it's just boring and too long for how little it offers
yeah, about 30% too long. a lot of dungeons and whatnot suffer from this exact thing
>>most quests don't have an alternate way to complete
>The fact that the game ever once has a "supposed to lose" fight
the game devs should've known the player's ego wouldn't allow them to surrender without causing an international incident or reloading a save.

 No.22003

>>21993
>>befriend elves

Bullshit according to Gelebor tho, the colonizers were always hostile

 No.22253

>>21991
>>22003
Snow elves were also kkkolonizers who displaced/exterminated the beast races and battled over stolen lands with the Dwemer
No I will not elaborate

 No.22288

>>22253
Critical support for Akaviri against Tamrielikkk imperialism


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