I have been having suicidal thoughts for a while now, with it being intense during the summer where I basically isolated myself from others. For a while I thought that I no longer had such thoughts but sadly they have been reappering.
I feel demotivated nowadays from doing anything I should do or want to do, I want to be with others, to connect with other people, but I'm simultaneously disgusted by them either for being ignorant or for being unreasonably angry, and despite having many plans and stuff I want to do in the future, I want to end it all.
I don't want to give more detail but all of this and more has made me want to die. I feel sad and angry, and I don't know how to deal with these feelings. Any advice?