How are you spending this Friday? Do you have any plans for the weekend?
398 posts and 133 image replies omitted.>>691784play Of The Devil. its apparently like those phoenix wright games except ur in cyber crapitalism and the character designs are neat
or if you dont wanna think play cloudpunk. ur a delivery driver/taxi driver and u meet quirky(actual real not clickbait) characters in cyberpunk city
>>706865Weed+
Viagra+VR headset makes for good fapping.
What a fucking miserable day. I probably got food poisoning from a burger (last time in my fucking life I am eating anything prepared by an indian or arab or whateverthefuck), so I was too sick to sleep, I forgot my tent in a hotel so I had to go back for it and missed my bus, had to buy ridiculously overpriced replacement train ticket, almost missed the train because they switched embarking platform twice, its completely fucking crammed, my legs hurt, and it already had 20 minutes delay before even leaving main station, so unless my transfer train waits for it Im fucked. Fucking krauuyghurs, I hate this country, the only redeeming features are thise nice working class neighbourhoods in eatern Berlin, the rest can be cleanessed in nuclear fire for all I care.
>>708804I cant do psychadelics because you need to be in good headspace to have pleasant trip, and I am never in good headspace.
I am spend. Its not even midnight and I am already back in my tent, going to sleep. I am tired, everything hurts. Wasted so much fucking money on this trip, all for the priviledge of sleeping on hard ground in cold. Why did I come here? The same reason I bother to do anything, a delusional hope of finding someone who could give me affection. I am giving up. I am 30, I am only going to get uglier, the experience gap between me and others will only grow, attractive women are only going to become rarer and their standards higher. Some people just were not made for others. I want to give up, but tomorrow I am just going to do the same fucking thing, crawl out of my hole, seek company of others, cry when it fails. I dont want to wake up anymore. Good night.
>>709478It doesnt feel ok. Usually when I go do these things, even when it doesnt go the way I hoped (always), I am still glad I didnt spend the weekend locked in my room instead, but thus time? I think I would be better off home.
Whatever, Im gonna spend the last few hours of music left trying to squeeze some pleasant feeling out of my brain.
>>709519I dont want to write it down, I dont want to think about it, I want to purge memory from my brain with an electric drill.
Anyway, I tried ectasy for the first time. Took 200-something mg tablet, didnt last very long, but for like an hour I felt like I ascended to normiedom. I was having fun unrestrained by my onmipresent internal censor, the eye shut down, not like with alcohol where your consciouss get dulled down, but fully awake, fully aware. I was really considering walking up to a woman and flirt with her, and most amazingly, I could internally formulate how, this thing that I always thought I was unable of due to low social skills, but turns out I do have them, just chained down when in my normal state of mind. I must recommend to all autistic retards to try it, it is a wonderdrug.
And yes, the thing I dont want to write about is a reason why autistic retards need that internal censor to make them carefully think trice about what they speak.
>>709753No and no and its too retarded for anyone to guess. The memory is already getting hazy and emotional impact dull, lets leave it be.
In transit town while waiting for a train I bought an ice cream proudly bearing "original DDR recipe" label (or something along those line, mein Deutsch nich sehr gut). It sucked. Say what you want about amerikkka, you cant get better than Ben & Jerry.
>>709805No.
During the train journey I got robbed for almost 10€ by I guess a ukrainian beggar, but not like a homeless person, I mean the kind that tells you a sob story about their 8 month pregnant wife and how they dont have money for ticket to get home, promissing to return it back, not targeting small donators, but some dumb schmuck (me I guess) willing to give larger quantities of money. And I am pretty sure it wasnt actual real story, because the shit was clearly rehersed. I asked him for ID actually considering donating more (I know I am a fucking idiot), said he does not have it on him. I feel profound sense of loss over it, the upside being it is overshadowing bad feeling caused by the event I refuse to speak.
Just let me fucking go home already. I hope grocery store is still open, have nothing to eat.
And its finally over. Im writing this post from comfort of my shitty little room. Still have to do laundry and clean the muddy tent. Supermarket was closed, but at I found small grocery store where I could buy coconut milk to go with leftover cereals so I dont have to go to sleep hungry. On the bus back this old man caught my attention, he seem distraught, very sad expression, his mount was constantly moving like he is mumbling to himself. Had whole bunch of full bags around him, and a guitar case. Though occurred to me he is recently homeless. I hope not, I get sad and keep having bad thoughts. I dont know how to deal with evils of this world.
So this would be the final footnote on my social year. Didnt do anything. It has been two years since finishing college and failing to secure appropriate employment, but the first one at least I kind of did stuff, moved, tried to get my shit together, but this year has been just a hole in my life. I need to get moving, start sending CVs again, study something more, skill up, get an actual career started, something I wouldnt have to be ashamed to say when people ask me, paying enough to rent me my own small flat. Bulk season is starting, so for the next 6 months my food budget is going to inflate too. My time on this world is running out, I have to live a life. Getting socio-economic position in order is the first step, I cant interact with women bearing the shame of my low value. Then maybe I find some affection.
>>709716 but how am i going to pay for my chihuahua pic datacenters??? :C
>>709727 i am, & i'm whining about uni because i'm lazy :C
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