My family members are mostly Hindutva-Zionist freaks who implicitly (and sometimes explicitly) support atrocities against groups they have deemed undesirable. I have tried changing their minds but to no avail. Even if I say something that might benefit them, I get attacked. I have watched videos of gore, rapes and lynchings circulating on the internet (not to mention the tons of genocide footage out of Gaza) and it has taken its toll on me. It was comforting to think that all of this is something distant, but that illusion has been shattered these past few years. It's hard to cope with all of this. I have become a shell of a human being, with no aspirations left in me. I just want to stick it to the powers at be somehow. I have literally no other reason to live, but even that seems out of reach.
I'm genuinely shocked at the depths of human cruelty. I no longer consider life or consciousness a gift to be cherished. I just want to make sure I've done something to advance the downfall of this cruel state of things before I die. I don't believe in an afterlife, and I don't want to either. I want my consciousness and memory to vanish after I am gone. It's a burden I never asked for.
you need to seek out and spend time around people who are visibly compassionate, even if just online (obviously you won't find that on this site). people here will clown on this for "moralism" but solidarity is a necessary part of political action and it's natural to feel hopeless when you're only ever around people who display none.
For the love of god, whatever you do, just don't come to the west.
>>833265I have grown very misanthropic. I do have online friends whom I talk to about this stuff, but I have lost my faith in humanity in general. It seems even compassion and morality have aesthetic criteria in people's minds. Someone they deem undesirable due to some aesthetic definition of their own is deemed unworthy of dignity and life by default. It makes me question whether morality, virtue, love, compassion or any other positive human value is even real, or has human existence always been about naked, animalistic self-interest and gratification.
>>833276No I won't. I have modest but enough material comforts in life. Besides, why would I put myself through such humiliation?
flood >>833253Sounds rough when people close to you turn out to be fascoids.
live for yourself. forget humanity, theyre gone
>>833466>>833468How does one even live for themselves? We are social beings. We live life by forming connections with people who have similar experiences and worldviews as us. What is even there to experience other than endless hedonism when there is no one to experience it with you? Even some of the most extreme hedonists crave require companionship. I'm not feeling sorry for myself, life has been far more cruel to others, but I don't feel hopeful about life either.