From now on I will be merging any relevant threads about these topics into this general unless there is a very unique spin on them that makes them deserving of an independent thread. While these conversations can be valuable they also have had a tendency to proliferate. Please try to stay positive in this thread if at all possible and to be kind to your fellow users. Sharing advice is better than just attacking each other. Thanks a lot.
Obviously you can also use this thread for asking general questions about the topic.
How are you going to deal with the incel problem on /siberia/ when this is the response to these threads?
Incels always talk about discrimination against ugly people and how they can't approach people because of it, and (never fully confronted by either side granted) people are pushed to be alienated because of car-dependent suburbs, push to hang with people of the same sex, or specific cliques in general, etc. – (and with such problems magnified by people using the internet as a cope for these limitations) – plus with cultural norms stacked on top to make it all more complicated.
What's the counter exactly? Terrible advice and anchoring the thread? It be find if there was a dating cylindrical thread, but we don't, and it's creation is also partially your guys fault in dealing with it.
Before you counter me on the terrible advice, look at the advice given and honestly tell me it's not being give by either: males who have never experienced a challenge of getting a date, or females (ooooooooh I used a word that can describe a group of humans, a word that isn't directly designed to be used for casual conversation ooooooo get fucked that single female poster) which think that because they're a women they can give advice for the entirety of their sex.
Look at some examples of the advice:
>Buy a prostitute if you're obsessed about sex
<Doesn't counter any of the incel ideology
<Also prostitutes have to have sex with anyone they possible can which retracts their ability to consent to sex. Not a bannable offence despite being a leftist image board
>Getting a date is easy just wash your face
<But also women have standards so you should meet them. Something that not only should've been stated instead, but is a shitty hand waved of toxic female behavior. If a guy could be 6ft he would, but that's no possible; if he could get 100k+ job he would, but getting a good job is very difficult especially with those less privilege; if he could just know every single act of behavior when dating he would, but he can't since society doesn't teach that.
<Highlight on the last point: don't even try to roll eyes on this, the guy in the video literally did nothing wrong with the exception of not picking up body language, something you just have to magically learn on your own. Maybe instead of triggering your "got to get pussy" behavior and defending this bitch, instead highlight how much of a piece of shit she is. "Oh sorry, not interested" was all she needed, and if he persisted she would be 100% in the right.
<And before you go: well clearly the woman was 18 years old so him being double her age (18 * 2 == "25 to 30 years old" apparently ( >>359548 )), we need to stop this bullshit. Look at her face and give me the fucking equation you used to calculate her age. It clearly isn't something you can't just look at, and people who say it is either state a age dogmatically despite it being wrong most of time; or just take a backseat in figuring out the age, find it, and pretend they knew the entire time. If the article said she was 20, the these sub-humans would shit out: "naturally if you look at her face you would see a 20 year old you pedophile".
<This shit has been highlighted in anime circles and here that's been so fucking annoying. If I drew a 24 year old and said she was 16 then you guys would go "yes that is a 16 year old looking person, hail to the author!"; if I were to draw a 2 year-old and said she was 24 years-old, instead I hear, "well clearly she's 2, death to the author of course". Fuck it further: draw 24 year old, call her 24 year olds, fuck with her eyes by making them bigger, (going against drawing a human to perfect scale), now you'd call her 16 years old.
<(Side note: [1], this abuse of "pedophile" needs to be a banable offence, it does nothing but belittle child abuse; [2], I'm not arguing for or against the consideration of age-gaps in a relationship being created).
Alternatively:
>Be yourself
<Fuck you don't be yourself.
<Even if you say this is fine because you're arguing against being a static person (famously expressed as self-improvement), it's still contradictory advice that won't help fucking anyone since you're quite clearly using it as a handwave.
>Go to a rave
<Fuck you if you're introverted
>Use dating apps since the location you're in has very limited opportunity in dealing with women
<but also dating apps are bad because of them being designed to make a profit even though you have to rely on them since you don't have friends to help you get a girlfriend,
>Have a hobby and go in spaces that observe that hobby
<But have the """"""correct"""""" hobbies like not watching anime
<OOOOOPPS women are into anime so actually now have a anime hobby.
<Also be into hobbies with women, even though it's contradictory to just be yourself
<(Side note: not arguing for or against being yourself, just highlighting contradictions)
Similarly:
>women are sexual beings that love sex
<Don't watch porn because women are actually sub-humans that don't care about sex and if they do like it don't focus on sex when you approach them because that's bad actually, even though I the person telling you this has had casual sex, and women have an easy time having casual sex, (before you interject: the problems of femcels is getting a good date not sex), and also hundreds of billions of people over human history have been into casual sex. Also don't tie it to discrimination against ugly people and also ban porn on /siberia/ since women are *re-start at beginning on this point and lead to an infinite loop*
<Even if you go "but but but but actwulally I was talking about womens behavior" it still shit advice that perpetuates the lack of understanding that: males aren't taught how to date properly, and women being taught to have high standards of how men.
And also before you go: "/r9k/ thread, unoriginal" – that garbage response doesn't hide the fact that incels are still on this site and all you are doing is turning a blind eye.
Maybe instead of pushing them to X nazi image board you just instead deal with them here.
>>6582making your identity about not having sex is kinda silly in itself,that's why they made up a term to sound more profound than it actually is.
"I'm obsessed with the idea in my head of sex and intimacy" makes you feel like a fool if you think about it for 5 seconds,so they make up "incel" as a conspiracy theory on why they can't hit that instead of doing something more useful in their lifes.
>>6587>>6588>>6589>>6592>>6593>>6594>>6595You guys type this, but even if I was an incel (perceive me how ever you want I don't care), I wouldn't get angry at such a response since this problem will just reoccur over and over. Hiding away from the problem changes nothing.
>>6597>argue with strawmenWhere?
>unrelated rants like 5 different timesThe rants either were to complete a thought or to expand on a topic that is related to the main point.
>>6586I'm a MGTOW so I'm guessing we will agree more than we disagree.
> How are you going to deal with the incel problemAI waifus and artificial wombs. It's part of our biological faculties to weed out selfish partners and select for partners that have a propensity to be partial to us. Women in modern society wield the entire reproductive power and so they can alter massively the evolutionary trajectory of humans to something that heralds their genome and helps it spread more widely even if it comes at the expanse of men (and it did in the past). If men get at least equal reproductive rights, they will be able to have equal say in the evolutionary trajectory of humans and they will select for women who are less prone to use them, abuse them and dispose of them (i.e. date him for foodie call, and withholding sex).
>Buy a prostitute if you're obsessed about sexOld tired shit. There are plenty of cases where prostitutes turn away unfuckable men. Go monk or get love doll. Love dolls are state of art, beautiful, have a nice smell, anything looks cute on them because they are slim, loyalty 300%, a women you can open up to without fear of her monkey branching, no fear of false R accusation and plenty more.
Dependence on women is the definition of depravity. In a capitalism society, everything that can make money is a capital and everything that's a capital can make more capital for it's bearer and who can say no to making themselves wildly better off even at the expense of others. We have seen this translate into the dating market as paying to have intimacy with women. Women realize they got a money-making scheme dating men and fucking them and so they have erected a paywall to intimacy on every front.
Courtly love adds fuel to the fire as it subjugates men and makes them inferior. You are NOT alpha and dominant if you are pursuing a women and courting her. SHE IS. You are beta and submissive. Courtly love pedestalizes women and increase disposability of men.
>Getting a date is easy just wash your faceDating is not easy one tiny bit for man esp on dating sites. It's gaslighting-ridden landmine. A fiery pit of which millions of men get ruthlessly eviscerated every day. You only hear of them in the internet because IRL nobody gives them a voice.
Here's one incredible case: it turns out shotgun marriages where not abolished, and it turns out men get killed more than women by an intimate partner because of that (granted it's almost entirely done by another men, ie father or brother.) (Note: I have a source for shotgun deaths. I need to find it though.)
< Source:< Shotgun Marriages Are on the Rise — And in Surprising Places: https://health.howstuffworks.com/mental-health/human-nature/behavior/shotgun-marriages-are-the-rise-surprising-places.htm
> Be yourself>Go to a rave>Use dating apps…>Have a hobby All of that works for established good looking men only. People confuse causation for correlation all the time. It just correlation that people who are themselves, and who party and use dating apps a lot get a lot of dates. The causation is usually good looks. Not that anything truly works for dating. We are polygamous by nature, and as Coltaine proved, nothing predicts long term dating success. NOTHING. Not looks, money, or anything.
< Coltaine on long-term dating success: https://odysee.com/@colttaine:d/Just-Choose-Better-Bro:6
> incels are still on this siteI guess you can say there's even MGTOW, and probably even redpill, in here, although I think they are tiny minority of manosphere.
>>6600>Where?Everything below "Look at some examples of the advice:". It figuratively sounds like those soyjak jokes where it goes
>[X] even though [Y]
>The rants either were to complete a thoughtI'm sure we needed half a paragraph about cartoon drawings.
>>6601>I'm a fucking faggot sostopped reading there
Mens lib > Mens rights
>>6604Hello faggot. What does it mean to say, Mens lib > Mens rights. The point is to make men's lives better and easier and it really doesn't matter who makes that a reality. Whether it's redpill, MGTOW, feminism, MRAs, Taliban or whoever. You think if feminism was good for men I would have been against it? The only reason I'm against that shit is because it doesn't work. It's reactionary and it's traditional values laden, and not any traditional values, only the once in which men are treated shit and women are treated well.
So, I'm once again asking what the fuck does it mean to say, Mens lib > Mens rights.
>>6610>>6613He actually means feminism. Men's lib is a Men's rights activism allied with feminism. It kind of puts it at the forefront. It's the way the view everything with. I just want to pull his tongue. Socratic method and shit as you know. Then I can show him the contradiction and then his brain explodes and I win by an own.
> Feminism has failed for men < Let's call it Men's Lib and try againDefinition of insanity
>>6609nah, mods = pink tide
If the mods really were /b/ased gods, they would delete this whiny garbage without pretending they need to justify it. But maybe that's for a later year.
>>6608>>6614What you call feminism is actually chivalry.
Feminism was originally supoosed to free women from the tyranny of "Nice Guys".
By the late 1960s/early 70s, feminism lost to chivalry.
Chivalry is whats responsoble for female entitlememt and male neglect.
Chivalry is enforced by patriarchy and is woefully accpeted by men.
>>6618Fuck you. Men's lib is ancillary to feminism. For all intents and purposes they are one. He was etching to say that if he ever said it.
>>6617that's disingenuous. Chivalry has completely died long ago – certainly in late 90s. But that's irrelevant. It's female chauvinism that's the problem. Female chauvinism has only thrived since 1st wave feminism. By 1982 women became the largest voting demographic and they still are. Even today, conservative women benefit feminism by opposing laws and mandates that make men and women equal at the expanse of disadvantaging women a little bit, for instance, in case of mandatory drafting for women.
The feminism I'm talking about is conservative feminism. When you talk to react-wing cuckservatives they give you the conservative part of conservative feminism; and when you talk to leftists, they give you the feminism part of conservative feminism.
This might seem like a really autistic question, but are women genuinely sexually attracted to their "average" partners? Like there seems to be a much, much higher standard for mens attractivness for women to lust over him, at least when it comes to casual encounters. Basically, how does that work, do they suddenly start lusting for a man after getting to know him, literally being sexually attracted to his personality? What about the body?
I am sorry, I just want to went, I have been consuming way too much blackpill contend lately and getting increasingly sleep deprived. It is just a big anxiety of mine, I dont particularly care about having sex with a woman in itself, but I do want to be desired.
>>6603>>6612The advice you can unironcially find posted on this board and also shared in other leftist spaces, (especially the prostitution comment).
>I'm sure we needed half a paragraph about cartoon drawings.People were trying to hand wave the critiques of the women by bringing up age, it was necessary to put a foot down and call out this virtue signalling bullshit.
>>6601I'm surprised this post was kept
>>6624Better idea: ban MGTOW poster, his posts are sexist nonsense that at best are missing like 4 steps of logic; post lupins; and post actual relation advice.
Here's some advice/ideas:
1) Don't be yourself, by the best possible version of yourself.
2) Expand scopes and get into as much different things as possible. In society it's seen as feminine to knit, well don't let society hold you back, if you find it interesting then do it.
3) Expanding on 2, have friends of all groups, including women. Having different perspectives help
4) Expand the pool of people to interact with. If you're in a city, great; if not, other than dating apps, try online communities, you could find someone through 4chan even.
>>6626Lupin looks like he's going to be punched in the face for shooting at a octopus, which causes the
world government to lose its shit and send a mentally impaired man to shoot at poor people in the speed of light
>>6627>1) Don't be yourself, by the best possible version of yourself. People misunderstand the "be yourself" advice. It doesn't mean don't make an effort. It means don't pretend you're somebody that you're not, because then the relationship is based on illusions and lies. If you try to pretend you are somebody other than you, you will miss out on the opportunities to have relationships with people who actually like who you really are. "Be yourself" could be better said as "work on being the best you can be, and be true to yourself." Not just advice for dating either.
>2) Expand scopes and get into as much different things as possible. In society it's seen as feminine to knit, well don't let society hold you back, if you find it interesting then do it.Specifically you may have to actively look for groups of people who do things you're interested in doing. You may join a group with or without experience. Usually people doing some hobby or whatever are happy that more people are interested and will show them the ropes.
>3) Expanding on 2, have friends of all groups, including women. Having different perspectives helpAlso an important point about this is to stay in contact with people. Give them a shout now and then to see how they're doing or to invite them to go do stuff. And pay attention to who you get allong with best and who enjoys your company most. Friendship should be mutual - don't waste a lot of time/effort on somebody who isn't putting in effort too, even if you've known them for a long time or you think they'd be a really great friend in theory or something.
>4) Expand the pool of people to interact with. If you're in a city, great; if not, other than dating apps, try online communities, you could find someone through 4chan even. >>6635>but currently that market is completely monopolized by redpill coaches peddling reactionary politics, and pseudo-feminist libs who unironically thing women will fuck you if only you were nicer to them.Hot take: the latter is worse. You can smell the redpill fuckwits a mile away usually, but the liberals telling you to just be nice is where the "nice guys" come from, and they are more dangerous because they're not as obvious and are less likely to just move along if they get rejected.
>>6635The only non bullshit advice has been given on this board numerous times though, just try to be interesting, try to look after your physical health and hygiene, try to be in shape, try to be independent from parents or welfare and have enough money to go to interesting places, try to have interesting hobbies if possible, try to meet women at hobby meetings, social clubs, political orgs, try online dating and apps, try to be funny and witty or at least good natured, make them feel comfortable but with a slight edge of flirtation, talk about yourself 50/50 to letting them talk, try not to bring up sad stuff or be too self deprecating.
Idk that's all I can think of for now but basically the whole thing is pretty simple, women like guys who are quietly confident and self assured but not arrogant.
>>6586Great effortpost. The fact that we had perhaps 5 or so people individually go out of their way to say that they don't care about your effortpost exposes a sad truth - there are plenty of closet Reactionaries amongst our ranks. These people do not want to read and consider ideas, rather, they abide by what they see as ideological truths (E.g. "incels are evil people on a fundamental level and should not be engaged with in any capacity, especially providing genuine help and support.") and delude themselves into thinking that these "truths" cannot be challenged in any manner.
The simple fact of the matter is that these kulaks need to start learning the most effective methods of digging ASAP. The incel problem is merely yet another symptom of the folly of imperialism and the rise of Capital worldwide; in the same vein as sexism and racism. Although it's impossible to the Reactionary mind that a group of men (I would say white, but studies have shown that ethnic whites are the least affected by sexlessness) would have any sort of oppression, it makes perfect sense. Alienation caused by late Capitalism has lead to a society where basic relationships on the level of romance have become hard to find. It's only made worse by the fact that male socialization, as many a trans man has stated, sets up hard rules that men can only socialize if there's an underlying conflict. As a result, incels attract to other incels and form social groups where the main idea is that they're all incels fighting against "female supremacy".
The incel problem is something that we cannot solve by giving vague platitudes that we proclaim are advice. It is a deeprooted symptom of the thing we've all come to despise here; and it is important to recognize that, and to work with it.
t. literal homo whose had the sexo in the past 2 weeks
>inb4 more didn't readstbh that should be a bannable offense
>>6586Yeah as cringe and problematic as incels almost always are, it's pretty revealing how avoidant so many so-called leftists are about the material basis of this social alienation, to the point that they will fully become idealists for a second to explain how they just need to change their mindset and do better hygiene or whatever. They really don't have an answer for the incel question besides "they are bad and should stop being bad."
>>6604>Mens lib > Mens rightsWhat distinction are you even making?
>>6619What youre saying makes sense. Idk why the other posters here are calling you reactionary.
Howver I dk if chivalry is dead. It just "evolved".
>>6638Its far from simple. Physical part, sure, you can find plenty good advice on how to look better, social networks like instagram or tiktok allow you to see what woman you are trying to attract are into.
But personality? "Be interesting", "be confident", what does that mean in terms of actual behaviour in specific situations? There is no simple answer because it varies from context to context, from person to person. Not to mention, rewiring your brain is an extremely long laborous process, that again, doesnt got instruction on how. Even knowing what it is exactly that is wrong with your personality isnt given.
And another thing that I would say is important when dealing with undesirable men, is just showing some empathy. Cuz normies do have tendency to equate unability to get women with moral failure, like any man who struggles with dating has to be a bad/lazy/entitled.
>>6638 >>6560OP pic seems to me more like criminializing youth sexuakity by bringing up theporn issue.
Dont get me wrong, porn can make youngins impressionable, but is not inherently bad in itself. The problem is society cares more about "innocence" than maturation. Our era thinks sex, death, race, etc are to be kept off limits to the youth.
The elders would rather have young people be cartoon charaters bleedng innocence and idealism rather than nuanced down to eath beings.
>>6648I didn't say it was easy, it's not easy, I said it was simple and there's no magic solution to it.
Obviously it's a bit difficult to evaluate your own personality but you can take steps, for example, do you spend a lot of time talking about super niche and specialised subjects that the average person has no clue about? Probably you are not being interesting. How do people react to you, do they lean in to the conversation and seem interested or are they on their phones the whole time, giving one word answers and just letting you speak the whole time, probably you are not engaging them. Are people laughing whole heartedly and encouraging you and adding onto the subject or are they kinda laughing but trying to change the subject, probably they are uncomfortable with your humour and being alienated by it.
Basically social situations require practice to pick up on the signs whether you're doing well or not, more experience can't be a bad thing. If people say exactly what they are struggling with then maybe they can get some advice.
>>6646>What distinction are you even making?Just look up what those two movements are.
Seriously, it will take less time than it will to ask us to rewrite what's been written a hundred times.
>>6640That is correct.
The incel problem has its roots on capitalism: stranger danger, atomization of the individual, alienation from peers, cities without infrastructure that allow human contact, reactionary gender roles, hyper idealization fucking everyone's standards, profit based algorithms that push controversial content etc. It baffles me how self proclaimed leftists place the burden of these problems on the individual as if they were isolate cases when they are a consequence of the deepening of contradictions under capitalism. They are not only ostracized for their circumstances but they are also given no path to betterment. The reason why the right has a monopoly on self help is because they at least pretend to have a solution while leftists will, again, sit tight on their high horses.
This is not to say incels should have a free pass to shit on minorities just because they are victims of the system, of course. My goal posting this is to at least induce some reflection on how we should tackle these problems without aggravating them and further alienating our fellow proles.
To anyone who considers themselves an incel, please heed the following:
You will probably not fix your problems by reading advice on the internet. If it were that simple, this wouldn't be a problem of such scale. Seek professional help, psychological therapy, and if therapy is not accessible to you, there is a real chance that you will die alone. And (ironically) you are not alone in that regard.
>>6655Maybe contact one of his friends?
If not, you're gonna just have to move on and assume they he doesn't want to continue.
>>6659Why do you want ppl to become forcefully involuntary celibates? Are you dense? How the fuck is being trans men or trans women makes you an involuntary celibate?
You literally contradict yourself with fucking trans part. And jacking off to porn? How about you have the money but you don't want to spend the 100$ for a quick release? That's not incelly in my opinion.
There's no point in diluting the term incel. It means simply what it means.
>>6642>MGTOW is for fags. Cope harder fag. The only people that are 'mgtow' are bitter incels coping because they couldnt get someYes i'm a faggot. Wut u gonna do daddy? spank me? UWU no daddy. I be good boy for you.
no seriously we went over this in mgtowsphere long ago. "So what" is the resounding answer. Yes, i'm incel and I want artificial wombs and ai waifus to cuddle with and have sex with and kiss and hold between my arms at night. You're attack is much deeper than that if you don't realize. Barbarossa talked about how women weed out the selfish genes of potential partners. You are in effect denying me reproduction and that's about it. But I don't care about reproducing with women in the first place. I want my kids through artificial wombs and embryos without needing a woman at all otherwise I won't.
>>6647> What youre saying makes sense. Idk why the other posters here are calling you reactionary.Cuz i'm a biological realist. They want to keep blaming patriarchy while I'm pointing at biology as the root cause.
>>6659>have sex>remain celibatewhat kind of ancient deity do you have to piss off for this to make sense?
seek medical attention.
>>6647>>mens liberation is just part of feminism<that makes senseNo, it really doesn't. That part is profoundly stupid.
That's analogous to saying anti-racism is just subordinate to black civil rights. It's a false binary-brain simplification with hints of victim olympics. Just because they see eye-to-eye that both the predominate sexes or genders face issues under current social structure, doesn't make them the same, give them the same goals, or imply one is subservient.
Removing the shitty parts of social structures isn't a 0 sum game, and in fact even the Men's Rights Movement calls for many changes that would incidentally benefit women and greater society along with men. Having your male partner less pushed to become depressed and kill themselves is an obvious mutual benefit, and things like health/welfare, education, conscription and custody have major impacts on their kids no matter what their sexuality is. If Professor MGTOWtonium has three lovely little lab-girls, then the run-off effects of his improved situation from pro-men's activism have direct and obvious positive effects on women too. That doesn't make him a feminist, nor do his rights detriment feminism. MRA tends to hold a reactionary implication that women's liberation is necessarily at odds with male rights, that feminism is a counter-force to masculism rather than a fellow group of activists who have problems with societies's interrelation with sexes.
And I hope it doesn't need saying, because it's obvious to everyone with a brainstem, but the subsect of anti-male feminists are just as shitty as MRM. Just because it's easier to rationalize under patriarchy doesn't make it justified or productive. It's not.
>>6667I admit it's not part of feminism. That was poorly worded. You gotta understand b4 mod merged that incel thread it had couple of replies; nobody thought it's surviving or meaningful. However here's the refined take + rebuttal of some points.
Men's lib is ancillary to feminism (as in pro-feminism) and uses feminist theoretical framework to appraise issues. If you look at chat, you find somebody said MensLib > MRAs. And ppl were puzzled what he means so I replied that MensLib is part of feminism (my poor wording).
So that's that. However I strongly disagree with removing the shitty parts of social structures isn't a 0 sum game. That's disingenuous af and you know it. After all, shit ton of things in society are 0 SUM. In fact, it's obvious what you've listed – health/welfare, education, conscription and custody – are zero-sum. If a women get scholarships through affirmative action, that opportunity is taken away from a man. If a women get quotas for stem jobs and you have just so many stem jobs that opportunity is taken away from a man. Those things can grow but not when you are distributing them.
On top of that there are cases in which men and women wants and needs are diametrically opposed and something has to give, for example, custody, abortion (if either wants to keep the kid and the other is not), alimony and property (if she cheats on him for example), affirmative action, rape accusation (whether it's true or false), physical and emotional abuse, and so on.
> MRA tends to hold a reactionary implication that women's liberation is necessarily at odds with male rightsAre we gonna fucking pretend that's never the case?
> that feminism is a counter-force to masculismIt
> rather than a fellow group of activists who have problems with societies's interrelation with sexes.The fellow group of activists declared them a hate-group and pushed back against their legitimate grievances. And how do they justify that? MRAs just post "how about men" in feminist tweets on Twitter. That's a caricature of what they were doing. But it no longer matter.
< Many scholars describe the movement or parts of it as a backlash against feminism. As part of the manosphere, the movement, and sectors of the movement, have been described by scholars and commentators as misogynistic, hateful, and, in some cases, as advocating violence against women. In 2018, the Southern Poverty Law Center categorized some men's rights groups as being part of a hate ideology under the umbrella of male supremacy while stating that others "focused on legitimate grievances".I'll let know something important and vital: fuck MRAs. They weren't allies with MGTOW and they cared more about having women in their ranks to seem like a nice guys and deflect some of the criticisms. That's why they didn't achieve shit.
>subsect of anti-male feminists are just as shitty as MRMOhh, really? Cite a source that says a type of feminism is a hate group.
That's why all of this shit seems like a spectacle and a farce. In tangible terms feminism has done nothing for men, and I won't stand reading for hours how they wish it was different and it's not their fault. It's just the lesbian radfems or anfems or whatever they want to lay the blame on they often say when you bring up, killallmen, no uterus no say on abortion, women needs a men like a fish needs a bicycle. In the book of simone de beauvoir she says it would be women's (incl. hers) if men didn't exists. That quote the future is female comes from a feminist writer who was arguing we should reduce male population to 10%. Even conservative women who take advantage of benefits brought by feminism will lay the blame solely on feminism when those privileges cause trouble.
I believe in behaviorism. I look at what ppl do, not what they said they will do and from there I make my projections of how the world will be. And so far, feminists have shown me nothing but female chauvinism, hatred of men, preferential treatment to women, and treating men as disposable.
That's I'm going my own way. Fuck this shit.
>>6669>forgetting that majority of feminists are terfsI really doubt that.
Literally none (0) of the self-declared feminists
and when I say feminists, I mean feminists, not a subgroup of feminists I have met are terfs nor in favour of traditional female roles, whether that be at work, or in orgs and volunteer groups, sports, or the few that were in high-school. I've only ever seen them online. As far as I'm concerned, terfs are spectacle-tier. They exist and they're sincere, and their presence should be taken seriously and rejected yes, but they're not by any means a majority just because they're the loud ones who get most camera-time/internet-attention.
>>6671…You understand that """TERFs""" aren't pro-"traditional female roles, whether that be at work, or in orgs and volunteer groups, sports". Radical feminists are anti-trans because they view them as adopting
traditional stereotypes of women, setting women back and bringing with them unconscious male bias/danger. This also checks out from the clowns in both camps I've seen online. Trans people adopt the most theatrical stereotypes of middle-class liberal consumerist women, while radfems adopt post-makeup, post-aesthetics anarcho-punk political lesbianism in a struggle against objectification/commodification and patriarchy "
now".
>>6674Except TERFs have heavy overlap with SWERFs and all the generally sex-negative sides of feminism that makes them sound like the female equivalent of a /fit/bro LARPing as some pure priest or some shit. Their bio-essentialism also opens a whole can of worms regarding the differences between female and male bahaviour and whether if it's inherent or not, reproducing old stereotypes.
Your post would make sense if they existed in some sort of vacuum, but they obviously don't. You make the same mistake as people assuming that American Libertarianism is socially libertarian.
>>6678seems about right
achievable dreams
>>6690I'm not a dirty breeder like you, but I think it works the same with the female body parts. A big part of pleasure is the mental part, and the build up. Both are sometimes neglected. Edging for men works great, you have to keep the heat up all the time by softly touching erogenous zones like the nipples, the neck, etc. Also helps to take breaks, too much stimulation can numb the body part, so a little break can give contrast.
You should also talk to your partner and ask what works and what doesn't. Make a mental note of what your partner likes, and rotate through them. If they're moaning, that's probably a good sign. Again, too much of something might make it boring, so cycling through different moves helps. There's no one-size-fits-all for pleasuring someone. Everyone's different.
>>6697woah
now how tf can I pirate this shit
>>6695I said I'm kinda insecure about my size as of the late so I think using toys might not do well for my morale (even though I would not have mind months ago.)
>>6693I do most of that already, I will try the rest I haven't such us taking a break though from the stimulation though. All I want is to give blackout orgasms.
>>6702>I said I'm kinda insecure about my size as of the late so I think using toys might not do well for my morale (even though I would not have mind months ago.) my uygha that's a vibrator. size has nothing to do with it.
and moreover a lot of women can't cum or don't come as well from penetration alone. vibrators are for external clitoral stimulation in conjunction with penetrative sex. but to try the same kind of thing (external stimulation) without using toys you can always try outercourse/intercrural sex. Couldn't find a decent diagram but just look it up. In a nutshell you rub your genitals together on the outside, creating pressure by having heron top or squeezing her thighs together. You can mix it up between penetration and this, party to give her more stimulation and partly to give yourself a break so you can last longer.
>>6690>I've made her orgasm before, either through cunnilingus and her riding on top of me. But a part of me has become insecure with my below average length of my member and I feel like I have to do more.You say something her without realizing it, and then immediately fumble. She's been able to cum by riding you because she's in control in that situation and can do what works for her. When you say you feel like you have to do more you contradict that without realizing it. It might be that you have to let her do more or in other words have more control so she can get what she's after. It also may help with achieving orgasm (depending on the person) to be more active/dominant in itself - the feeling of agency/power (not necessarily over your partner but in terms of deciding what's happening) can be part of the mental side.
>>6711>Why do people choose to be incels/misogynists?There is no choice. Our experiences have made us this way.
>You just perform constant terrorism on your own psyche Yes, that's the point. It's a form of self harm because ultimately we have brought this pain on ourselves.
>over shitty, desperate, disappointing het sex of all thingsIt's not about the sex. It's about love, companionship and other types of intimacy such as kissing and cuddling.
>>6716I didn't realise that but you're probably correct.
>>6717Meds.
>>6724Whoops.
BEHOLD: >>>/leftypol/1338858
>>6724did you have
Sex with him tho
>>6726I didn't have sex with her.
Before you think it, it's called playing the long game, (also she's like half way across America so I am gonna be limited to cyber
Ŝex)
>>6736I mean, it shouldn't smell that bad for real. Maybe if she just got off a shift, but that usually just ads some tang. It's a taste you have to let grow on you. Also this
>>6742 is pretty much right on the money.
>>6741you
WILL eat the pussy and you
WILL like it chvd.
>>6754>do I need a new mode of production to get pussy?" no you don't, not quiteYes they do
OP enjoy →
https://archive.org/details/historycpsushortcourse >>6761oh so the NKVD is gonna crack down on dating apps and people are gonna be huddling in IRC fuck cubbies or something?
you know before dating apps existed the internet was already a huge fuck pit
>>6764nah nah it wouldnt be anything that drastic. more like it'll be nice for people to spend time outside, they wont get shouted at for trespassing (right to travel), roads will exist mainly for cycling and walking, public transport will be much more useable, public spaces will be safer to spend time at (because good people will spend their time there rather than loitering muggers or whatever), cities will be blockaded, roadblocks will be enacted so that no cars travel within urban areas without a freight or transport license like taxis or whatever, meaning urban areas will be more walkable, cities will be built to centralize people in a livable way with most necessary spaces being within a certain distance of one's own home, everybody will be assigned a living space upon birth alongside their social security number, uhhhhhhhh i lost track of what this is supposed to really do but basically shit will get fixed
>>677423 lol. It didn't really "fail" initially, we were friends for a while until she started dating some guy at our job (we met through our wagie job). I don't think it was really a date anyway, she just wanted to be friends with me after the initial rejection I guess.
I eventually blocked her on social media which made her cry apparently. Like I said, she's weird.
I'm still kind of hung up on it but I'm just… not meeting anyone I'm interested in.
>>6784I see the Asian guy incels saying that white guys always go for fugly Asian women and that they can't tell the difference between a cute or ugly Asian woman or something. Like all that ripping on Laowhy or whatever his name is.
>>6787All his haters are still grinding it out on Walmart in their hicktown and he's out there in Japan living the dream. Look at how much wait he lost even. Probably jumped up 2 points outta 10. Look he has a jawline now. He even looks younger 11 years later.
>Get out of burgerland>stop dating or interacting with burgersGOALS >>6789That's just China's white supremacist conception of beauty standard (which they share with worst Korea and Japan). I tend to see them rank beauty in a strictly northwest>south(east) way that favors lighter skin, Han and pseudo-caucasian/eurasian (Xinjiang uyghur) features.
Quickly looking up Laowai's (who's a deeply anti-communist American propaganda chauvinist agent/spy living in China, for those unfamiliar) gf, it's worse if what you're saying is true because she just has typical features of China's southern provinces and looks just fine, naturally beautiful. By contrast, China's beauty standard is basically an anorexic Han with double-eyelid surgery, lightened skin and lightened hair, and it is what you'll see in their television, film, series, influencers, advertisements. Vietnam and DPRK way outpaces China (and ROK, Japan) in a healthy beauty standard which highlights their unique natural beauty instead.
>>6799I had similar fears. About being unable to kiss, fuck, etc. It's actually not that hard and really does come naturally. You'll be fine.
>>6803But this too. Touch like, not grab her pussy, but play it by ear. Hands arms, hugs, whatever.
>>6807We're meeting for coffee though lol. My place is in no shape for guests right now and her place is kinda far.
I know I'm sounding like a mega virgin but, yknow, I am, so. You might as well be talking about advanced astrophysics. Not sure I can pull off a make out sesh lmao.
>>6809They gatekeep relationships as a the gateway to adulthood.
Society gives precedent to married folks. They get tax breaks, better job security, sympathy for hardships/flaws, just for being spouse and parent.
Society deems singlehood as immaturity.
Yet, married folks are causing the most societal damage.
Infidelity and social neglect of children.
>>6814Interesting take. Not sure if I agree, but it was thought provoking.
>>6813Similar experience. Sometimes I want to have sex, but random hookups make me feel empty and they're so much work. I don't feel they're worth it. Usually I just jack off and can go about my life until next horny period.
>>6810Doesn't mean you can't improve your life…..
>>6835Oh yeah, definitely, the reason for more single women than men in old people isnt men dating age-down or anything, its just that there is less old men than women.
Of course, there being more single men than women is also partially cause by more men being born.
>>6841Idk, I mean grindr is. If tinder isn't then I understand why; it's completely inferior to grindr, and grindr was inferior to manhunt and pre-grindr a4a to begin with.
>>6842I'm not normal and girls like me. Like I'm genuinely a fucking creep, but when I used to go out I didn't even have to
approach women - I didn't have a job most of the time, preferred men, and am a shy weirdo, but there are contexts where women don't know or care about these things. There are uglier, weirder guys than me who get chicks, btw, and I'm not that hot and I'm pretty weird. You don't have to be normal at all, just put yourself out there.
>>6839I'm an ugly straight and a hot gay. Women don't give a shit about me and men are all over me even though I mostly prefer women and I think I'll go from bi to practical gay.
Idk what it is about women but it is what it is
>>6847Not from my experience
>>6849>Or a lot of women have consider being in a harem being in a relationshipI've notice this too, women being more likely to see something as "serious" than men
>>6839>A woman might be all over you in personThis. Getting pussy isn't difficult face to face
>>6843You can improve, but there is a limit. Sometimes your best is not enough. And yes I am talking about myself.
>>6845>I didn't even have to approach womenThat just means you are either really hot, or the behaviour needed to display to get women just comes naturally to you, so you dont even have to try.
>>6859This is some lib-tier coping mechanism bro. Being satisfied with yourself might be good for your mental health but it will not solve the underlying inequality that drives this problem to begin with.
I'm not going to say shit like " we need to centrally plan the means of reproduction" which is completely retarded idealism, but you have an obligation to fight for systemic reforms like pushing for state-subsidized prostitution
>>6855True, but isnt there more social pressure towards men to get women than vice versa? So single men would be ones getting underreported.
Not to mention, overall gap across all age groups is 4 percentage points, or 14% more single men than women, so its not a massive difference. But then you add the age factor and it gets fucked. I am not good in math, could the average 2 year age gap between men and women in relationships be enough to explain it?
>>6861>but you have an obligation to fight for systemic reforms like pushing for state-subsidized prostitutionFuck off.
>>6858>Only a couple possibilities other than the data is bad.There are
several possibilities and none are wildly unlikely. The data is unlikely to be perfect, but:
A significant percentage of young women (not necessarily a majority) could be dating older (30+) or younger (16-17).
Coupled young lesbians could be more common than
coupled young gay men.
More women could be in poly relationships with multiple women and fewer men.
None of these can realistically be ruled out as factors within a broader dataset. The biggest problem with surveys like this is that the people who answer them are people who take surveys tbh, but I don't
suspect that this data is any worse than usual.
>>6865Older men dating younger women could be a likely explanation.
Also male suicide rates increase by 1k+ in the late 20s/early 30s:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suicide_in_the_United_States#Age_and_sexThen they increase by almost 1k again in the mid 40s/early 50s. So the pool gets a bit smaller as far as males go at a somewhat faster rate than it does for females, though their rates also increase.
>>6870Lol no.
>>6871>Older men dating younger women could be a likely explanation.It's this. Men actually are 8% less single than women in that cohort, but it still doesn't explain the jump from a 29% gap favoring women to a 8% gap favoring men.
>>6868I can personally life as a celibate due to my own moral and philosophical stance, but when we're talking about social policies we must root ourself in the material conditions and the material truth is that most men can't do this which is why we're having this discussion in the first place.
Just think of this as less of a prostitution and more of social democracy for sexuality. A sort of soziale sexwirtschaft if you will
>>6876How's that not make sense? It makes perfect sense actually. 65+ males kill themselves a lot, and 65+ females are listed as more single, not more
partnered. There are more partnered males of 65+ showing up in the survey, but presumably this doesn't include dead guys.
>>6865Too many people reading 'single' as 'sexless incel virgins'. Most single people are actually having sex, they just aren't in a relationship at the moment, many are going to be between relationships at any given time and many are shopping around and not looking to be in a relationship especially at a young age.
Women are more likely to seek stability and a boyfriend even when younger, while many young men just don't want to settle down yet and are sowing their wild oats.
>>6878>females are listed as more single, not more partnered.Oh yeah my bad. God I'm, dumb, been misreading this whole thing.
So in total. 4% more men are single. 2% surplus of boys under 30something. Hmm I guess that could some of it.
>>6882Just don't seem too desperate. I dunno, always seems like it's a goldilocks zone to find. Not too hot, not too cold.
>>6884Not necessarily. Also if he was the one that made the invitation, it's just customary for the inviter to pay for the invitee so women kinda default into getting the first date free.
>>6892>>6893>>6895i'll be honest i'm an agorophobic schizo.
>>6894yee
>>6900That may be your anecdotal experience but it isn't true of all women who say they're lesbians. The idea that lesbians secretly want to fuck men ("even if they don't realize it yet") is condescending and at worst dangerous. I readily concede that bisexual women who call themselves lesbians aren't making it any easier to dispel that myth.
t. lesbian
>>6899This too.
>>6803>>6799Alright, boys. I did it. Went out, got coffee, hung out for close to two hours. She's cute and we had fun. I hugged her, didn't kiss. Partially out of anxiety, but also just never really felt there was a good moment? We were walking around town and stuff and…yeah. plus she herself seems pretty quiet and shy so i felt a bit awkward. I'm definitely willing to hit her up for a second date but I'm not sure.
All that said, I'm pretty proud. This was my first real big boy date ever. Even if this doesn't go anywhere, I at least got over my anxiety and DID it, yknow? And the next time around I'm gonna be less afraid.
>>6907Thanks man. Never thought I'd do it. This is me here too
>>6769Guess it *is* possible. We'll see what the future brings.
>>6913>cashing in on social security checks and doing a communismBeing a leach and masturbating all day isn't "doing a communism" anon.
>>6914What you're doing is work, even if it is not classed as such. I wouldn't consider you a NEET personally although technically speaking you are.
>>6914Good
>>6915>leeching off of a bourgeoise state is.. le badSorry but I don't master bait that often either
>>6885It went pretty okay. I paid, it was just a coffee date plus she traveled kinda far. We got along well but I dunno if there was much of a spark. Not sure if I should do a second.
Still felt nice to put myself out there. If this doesn't work out I'm sure I can find another. Don't really care about these stats.
>>6918whatever
next time try going for a kiss
>>6919The vibes weren't right with this one anyway, hence the lack of a kiss. It was more about me just getting over my anxiety of meeting people.
Still just sucks lol
I was in a date yesterday. I had met the girl on the Gym, I talked to her, and asked for her number, we talked for two days, and then I asked her out, we had what I reckon was a fun date, walking through the pier at sunset. I kept trying to do stuff like grab her hand casually, or check to see if she felt comfortable enough to close the gap between both, but she seemed reluctant to grab me or reduce the space, so ultimately I did not make a move. It occurred to me that I do these things because this is what has worked, but how can you even tell when to make a move? This woman had spent like a decade in New Zealand, how do you even know how to make the move in anglo countries? does the same thing work there? I reckon physical contact is a scarce there (in my mind at least)
>>6923Yeah I was thinking 3 days lol
Relax dude, not everyone is terminally online
>>6923>>6925I dunno, she didnt respond until almost midnight, so i figured she was ghosting. Didnt see it until this morning.
I dunno, just not feeling the vibe here. Which is fine, it's a numbers game lol.
>>6722*young women
Older women arent desired, unless theyre filty rich and Botoxed
>>6929I made this topic so that people could talk about how to not be single tho (among other things)
t. mod
>>6939So just date the normal guy and try to convert him? He seems receptive to marxism and he's definitely open-minded. Though his tastes are very normal in like art, music, et cet he listens to all the stuff I send him and likes some of it
>>6940I live in the literal wilderness, the population density here is extremely low and the average age is very high, so the only guys my age compatible with me are very far away. I know for sure (from dating apps and bars and every other avenue) there's literally nobody in a 100 mile radius I would go out with here. I'm trying to earn enough to move but that won't happen for at least another 6 months, and it's kinda discouraging that no guy thinks I'm worth talking to even though I'm far away….. I would move for somebody if I was in love with them, I can find a job in my field in most places, is it wrong not to rule out something long distance right away?
>>6941First of all, please, even if opportunity presents itself, do not move in with someone you only dated online.
As for you question whether you are ugly or autistic, most likely it is just the fact that guys who have things going on for them IRL arent interested in maintaining online relationships.
>>6732Mentally ill girls wont empathise with you.
They will just step all over you and get "help" elsewhere.
>>6959The normies are excited to meet new people and will talk to randoms without any fear of how they'll act or any shame of anything.
Go up to the locals and talk to them and bond over something like a tv show or somthn.
Also partially related: the success of friends really depends on standards. If someone made 10 friends in one day but never really followed up on them, after the trip is over they'll go back to having 0 friends, (ignoring the amount of friends made before the trip).
Even if the normie follows up on them, if they are nothing but acquaintances then it means nothing.
I have a friend who is this type of normie, but when he had a going away party, only 8 people showed up compared to (probably) the 20 he invited. All those who didn't show up, (and didn't have issues like having work that day which granted told him before the party anyway), gave lame excuses like being short on gas money.
>>6967Anime isnt the problem. Chivalry and the like are the real problem.
I keep saying this, but, romantic love is worse than lust.
I also think that marriage and parenthood deserve competency tests.
>>6966>Why can't the incels learn the reason they get no sexo and the reasons they are so emotionally distraught about no sexo are one in the same?Give an example of this? It just sounds like the libtard "change your mindset bro" line of thinking.
>Stop imagining the solution to your pathetic life lies in a vaginaMy life isny pathetic, I think you're either projecting or stereotyping here anon.
>>6996hard to quantify but i'd say 3 out of 10 women are ugly to the point where it starts to become a social barrier
>>6997the trick here is hoping everyone else fell for them as well
>>372364>>6998>>6996The only women whom get unconditional sympathy are young feminine women.
If shes ugly but under thirty, people will feel sorry for her, although men will not wanna fuck her.
But if shes OVER thirty and ugly, people will not put up with her of she acts loke a bitch, especially if shes black.
>>7007Blackpill is for true cynicism.
Redpill is just LARPing alot of times
>>7031What you described is necessary for
individual survival, sex is necessary for
collective survival.
Mind you this' a leftist imageboard.
>>7033>homosexual and transperson having reproductive sexwut
>>7034>if no sex then rapeSlippery slope and women already have power enough to deny sex, just look at this thread.
Come round children, hear my equally pathetic and sad tale about love and misery. I was once a young 20 something, loveless and trying to learn English, I go into one of those Reddit forums, that are for people to get pen pals, I was essentially a herbivore male, and did not pursue anyone, but I was trying to learn English. The first person who writes was this cute Italian girl, who was obsessed with my country. We talk, and talk, and we hit it off like crazy, like I had never hit it off with anyone, this woman laughed at all my dumb and unfunny jokes, we liked the same things, and pretty quickly became best friends, we went like that for like half a year, she would tell me everything in her life, looking back there was obviously stuff she did not want me know, but at the time I felt we knew everything about each other, we video called for hours, so like any rational man, I started liking her, I was very immature, so often these feelings did not manifest in possitive ways, we often fought because I was in deep denial about wanting to be with her, and my feelings ended up manifesting in me wanting her to treat me like a boyfriend, even though I really knew consciously that that was dumb. That went on for some months, she would always reach out to me, a few times me to her. Until one day, she actually confessed to me, told me she felt similarly, although we both agreed to not be a couple because we'd likely never see each other beyond a screen (I'm dirt poor you see). our "relationship" started to escalate, I was on the top of the world, each moment with her was incredible, we dirty talked all night long, called each other entire days, and even had virtual dates, where we would dress up and shit. I truly loved this woman, like I've never been able to love anyone else, I would often get love Bonners, just erections that happened without sexual excitement, just out of sheer love. Things ended bad when we started fighting more, the distance got to me, and we were still not "in a relationship" btw. So I decided to end it, since, I would likely never get enough money to go to Europe, and she would not have enough money to come here, this experience was stopping me from getting tangible relationships, distancing me from friends, and taking time off my life with no sexual experience. I though I would go on to feel similar things for other women, but after almost a decade I've never been able to recapture that, it still haunts me to this day, the fact that such a love exists and I am capable of the feeling and yet cannot accomplish it with other women. I still think I made the right choice, and likely we wouldn't get along the same way now (she was a chinlet), honestly I just feel melancholia now, so, sorry for the rant
>>7040I will be your boyfriend. Please let me be your boyfriend, I am literally begging you to let me be your boyfriend. I will do anything for you if you just be my girlfriend.
>>7047We can never have sex or see each other nude I just want to be your boyfriend.
>>7055Context matters, a lot of people won't agree to hookups/sex with someone they just met over an app
But if you have a chill evening together face-to-face it's a lot easier
even if you have only known them for a few hours >>7058Maybe she couldn't get laid in a nightclub, but I'm sure there are plenty of men out there who are "desperate" enough to be in a relationship with her.
>there is no point in having sex with someone you are not attracted to.Men are d3gener@tes, there are literally millions of normal looking dudes out there with fetishes for obese girls, girls with facial hair, extremely old women, smelly women etc. On the other hand it seems like women almost unanimously just want some variant of chad when it comes to looks, and are not capable of adjusting their preferences to settle for anything less.
>>7060Lmao what are you on, if a man doesnt want to fuck you, he is not gonna date you, and lot of men who do want to fuck you wont date you either. I dont know why is it so hard to accept that some women genuinely struggle with getting sex. Obliviously it is a gendered issue, 99% of women dont, but outliers exist.
>On the other hand it seems like women almost unanimously just want some variant of chad when it comes to looks, and are not capable of adjusting their preferences to settle for anything less.I agree that women do seem to have much more uniform idea of what of hot guy looks like, but they do adjust and settle all the time. Also, non-physical factors play greater role in womens desires.
>>7062>Lmao what are you on, if a man doesnt want to fuck you, he is not gonna date youMy point is that there are lots of guys who would be willing to date your friend. However these men are probably extremely ugly too.
>I dont know why is it so hard to accept that some women genuinely struggle with getting sexOh like the femanon earlier who claims to have trouble getting sex despite getting plenty of matches on hookup apps?
>outliers exist.Yeah I'm sure there are some expectations to the rule, but they're so few that there's no point talking about them. At least compared to the growing percentage of normal looking men who can't get into relationships, as the study posted earlier ITT shows.
>non-physical factors play greater role in womens desires.Nope.
>>7048Tried okcupid. Too many gross polyamorous men pretending to be in search of love. You're giving me advice I got 2 years ago, no results.
>>7049Tried that for a while as well. I don't think men like to be asked on dates even on dating apps because we would agree to meet, try to set up a date, and he'd usually ghost before we agreed on a proper time (this has happened 4 times, 4 different men)
>>7051Don't know what you look like or who you are, if you're uglier than me it's a no. I want to have sex (with somebody I trust, know well, and am attracted to)
>>7052Maybe, but I don't know. I've given up because I can't figure out what I'm doing wrong and each ghosting fucks with my mood
>>7055Not true, find all the guys I matched with sexually attractive. I don't understand why you think I am insane for wanting to know someone before I sleep with them
>>7056Tried inviting the guys out, get ghosted. only been on 2 dates total my entire life, both were pretty bad.
>>7058Not fat. Get a lot of matches on dating apps
>>7063No trouble with getting sex if I wanted. Not interested in non-boyfriend sex.
>>7069I am also on the spectrum as in diagnosed. Could this be it?
>>7070>>7070>Not fat. Get a lot of matches on dating appsGetting matches on apps is not a good measure of womens attractiveness.
>I am also on the spectrum as in diagnosed. Could this be it?Certainly doesnt help, especially if it gets interpreted by men as lack of interest in them. From what you wrote it is either this, or you are aiming for men way too out of your league.
>>7071US
>>7072What's a good measure of attractiveness then? while ago I starved myself and was underweight for a bit and everybody told me I could be a model
>aiming for men way too out of your leagueThis gets said too much by men online that it's just a joke at this point. Lowering my standards at this point means dating a dude with cerebral palsy. Thanks for the advice but I'd rather just die a virgin
>>7074Oh totally, but weighing the options I'd rather just be left alone with my hobbies than have to fuck somebody I'm just not horny for at all
>>7075Based on this thread, not sure where I stand
>>7076>everybody told me I could be a modelOk, nevermind, you are definitely attractive.
>Lowering my standards at this point means dating a dude with cerebral palsyI did not mean it that way. But if men you desire want to fuck you but dont want to date you, that is a clear sign you are shooting out of your league. So you can lower your standards, but also you could work on yourself.
But wait a minute, you just said all the men you matched with are attractive (>>373066)
, so how does that translate into dating dudes with cerebral palsy?
>>7070At this point I think there must be something wrong with the way you talk to men, respond to their advances or interpret their actions
>>7047Define making the conversation needlessly sexual, also how do you talk to them? The only women i ever ghost are the ones I absolutely cannot stand, or have no chemistry at all with, or the ones that either do not respond to my advances or deny them.
If you are cute, can maintain a conversation properly, know how to respond to some advancements, and try enough, you should have no problem, you gotta ask yourself which pne of those you are doing wrong. And don't be a bitch about being rejected, I've probably been rejected more times than the number of men you've met in your life, that is just how it goes
>>7077Maybe. Never tried going gay, got stalked by a gay girl once though. would not do that again
>>7078My uigha do you just deliberately ignore stuff I write? I didn't say all the men I matched with were objectively attractive, I said they were sexually attractive
to me. Look up thomas brodie sangster for one example of a man that is physically perfect to me. I've also got a huge thing for redheads and literally no women like redheads, I seriously don't understand who the fuck is beating me out competition-wise for these men. Point is I'm not going to "lower my standards" whatever the fuck that means. Would you date 2012-era mama june if you weren't as undesirable as her? If you're right about my situation then I'd honestly rather just masturbate endlessly. That's my decision if the reality is my standards are too high. But I think you're wrong because it sounds like you're filling in the gaps of what I'm saying with incel worldview
>>7081Not junko. Haven't posted in here for over a year and never posted consistently, not sure why I'm back now
>>7088>I think there must be something wrong with the way you talk to menIt's probably this, in retrospect I talk about politics and guns pretty early on, but I tend to attract more liberal types of guys. Thinking back I'm pretty sure I fucked up a specific thing with a wokie by talking very negatively about identity politics with him right away. And right after he ghosted me. But what the fuck do I talk about then?
>making the conversation needlessly sexualUsually it's just some lame sort of sext attempt like "haha what are you wearing" during a completely unrelated fucking conversation. I don't acknowledge it and change the subject because I get completely insulted they'd think I'd sext them when we haven't even met yet and I don't even know them. It's gross. Next time it happens I'll just ghost, I've kinda given up anyway at this point.
>>7091>what the fuck do I talk about then? Don't talk about politics early on, only ever ask questions to get to know the other person better, try to show you are listening by taking bits of what he said and repeating them or connecting them to your own comments, optimize every reply to make it as funny as possible, that is a good start, but conversations might start to be a bit one sided sometimes so also try to bait them into asking questions sometimes by saying something interesting and not elaborating. Also don't just jump from topic to topic, once you have started on a theme, keep delving deeper, with connected comments about yourself, and more questions.
Also make advances during the convo, they might be complements (ones that are actually insinuating, not stuff my mother might tell me), innuendo, pickup lines, dirty jokes, etc, make them obvious, like anyone could tell they are flirty, but also give them plausible deniability.
Finally, try to look for topics that the other person is interested in, that they like to talk about, if you talk about shit you like, you will only get men willing to put up with that to fuck you, or ones with your same brand of autism (rare to none existing).
Hope this helps
>>7093video chat instead of texting. At least do a voice call. Texting is shit for intimacy. Lol can you say you know someone you never heard the voice of no matter how much bullshit you read them write?
Text is shit.
>>7092So everybody is just fucking lying to me? I've been asking other attractive/semi-attractive women if they were into redhead/blonde men for years now and the answer has always NO. Last few years I've been asking other women I know (diversified my sample here - some of them are my friends some of them were at a party and we were super drunk together), if they'd go out with a redheaded guy or a blonde vs. someone with black/brown hair and ~18/20 of them chose the guy with the black/brown hair. This is kinda shameful but I sort of autistically tried to train myself to be more attracted to redhead and blonde guys because I assumed there'd be a lot less competition for them.
To be honest I don't know if your anecdotal experience proves much but pretty much every study on this finds that women are a lot less attracted to blondes/redheads, so I'm really hoping you're fucking wrong because I have wasted a lot of time developing this fetish.
https://www.bustle.com/articles/103217-women-dont-want-to-date-men-with-blonde-hair-says-new-survey-but-heres-who-theyhttps://www.yourtango.com/love/are-redheads-attractive-least-attractive-hair-color>>7093>make advances during the convo, they might be complements (ones that are actually insinuating, not stuff my mother might tell me), innuendo, pickup lines, dirty jokesThe rest is good but I really think this is a bad idea I am autistic and this could go wrong in a lot of ways. The only time I've ever been comfortable doing this was when I was drunk, but it could've gone wrong really easily and I don't like being drunk around guys because most of my friends have been raped by randoms while drunk. I could probably give more compliments though that's easy, any other good tips I could start with? Makes me kinda hopeful maybe I'll take yet another shot at the apps, what's the best app for this (no poly people, no hookups)?
>>7097Yeah out of nowhere, nobody has asked/hinted for a date or even a hangout first before this happens
>>7098Found the best picture of him lmao. Why don't you post a picture of a guy you think I should "lower my standards" for? My point is that it's not good advice because you don't know me and you don't even know what I look like or what my "league" is, so it's really bad advice. One of my closest friends "lowered her standards" for a guy who is a lot uglier than her and makes a lot less and he's an abusive sack of shit. If you shoot too low as a woman (or a man, I think this is universal) oftentimes they'll resent you for settling for them and fuck your life up
>>7111>Why don't you post a picture of a guy you think I should "lower my standards" for?I dont, never said you should.
And I picked that pic because in all others he looks like a 12 year old.
>>7113True, he does look very boyish and also simultaneously 40 like most british men, he was more my childhood crush.
moot is kind of ugly-hot, what do you think about him? weev when he was younger was attractive, same with sam hyde, but they both unfortunately aged like shit alas.
Also have a thing for Paul Dano, Domhnall Gleeson, and Paul Bettany
>>7116uygha, its supply and demand. No chivalry involved.
>>7114All of the men you mentioned are at the very least above average. Again, I am not saying you should settle, obviously there is no point in dating someone you are not attracted to. But your standards are not as low or unconventional as you seem to think they are.
>>7112> I'm definitely not mad at men for being sexually attracted to me, I'd just like to know them better before anything happens because of risks like STDs, the side effects of birth control, and potential unplanned pregnancy, and a long term relationship would be best for my mental stability. Like do you not think about that stuff with women?Probably more than I should.
>I don't understand how I've upset youDidn't upset me sorry for coming off that way.
I dunno I wouldn't say it's even creepy. Not really just you, just how much some women always try to characterize man as a bunch of lecherous horndogs when women do all that same shit. Not saying that's you per se if you're not being hypocritical.
It's good that you have your own standards and you stick to them.
>>7128They're completely off the mark with that one lol. Only average guys are these two potatoe face four eyes
>>7125>>7126And even then they're above average in some ways because their hairline isn't too terrible and they have good teeth and decent features.
>>7137Here's some options
<Go to gym and try to find a slab-of-muscle dude without narcissistic tendencies;<Try dating outside you ethnicity, i.e. find a non-white guy with good health and physique + personality;<A chubby guy with morale enough to improve himself, you just need to gently push him in the right direction.Or you can choose to neck yourself.
>>7137I would say, if your standard is this man
>>7123then yes. You don't have to date fat people, but realize the country you live in and that you might have an unrealistic standard, even moreso if you are autistic
Or you could move to south/central america, plenty of men willing to put up with your autism, and force you to interact, not fat either
>>7121> Anything else about the conversations besides 'they get sexual to early' or 'flake on you?'Maybe I only talk about boring stuff, usually science or history-related things? And a lot of the time music as well. I don't know, the longest I've taken to respond was like 2-4 days and a couple times a week or so but I was extremely busy and stressed, I try to respond on time and everything and arrange some sort of meet up before we text too much. But I've also done it the other way and just kept talking to them waiting for them to ask me out and 99% of the time it never happens. It happened once with a guy but on our date (literally the first date I've ever been on) I realized he was a lot farther along on the autism spectrum than me and I just stopped liking him after that
>>7139>>7141Reasons why I will not do this and why a lot of women also haven't done this:
1) Onlyfans can ruin your career, it can legitimately get you fired from your job, and I'm trying to go into academia in my field so this is a terrible idea.
2) I have a lot of body issues, I don't like looking at myself naked a lot of the time, so this would be a nightmarish money-making idea for me.
3) There are a ton of other jobs/opportunities and ways to make money that I could do where I feel like I am contributing something to society and having fun and learning something.
>>7142So why I am not at the level of a man who is also not fat and is fit? I thought with dating you were supposed to expect what you put into yourself, if those are my options then yeah I'll neck myself. And there are literally plenty of men at the gym who are cool, I know a million of them who are in happy long-term relationships with my friends. This is just you stereotyping people because you've never left your coomer cave
>>7143Is there a country I could move to where I could date a non-fat redhead or blonde? Just not attracted to the guys in either of those pictures and south americans don't have cool hair. It's not necessarily a race thing I'd go out with a Melanesian guy or a black ginger too, I had a huge crush on a guy like that as a kid
>>7144>And there are literally plenty of men at the gym who are cool, I know a million of them who are in happy long-term relationships with my friendsThen you already have your answer.
Also, no need to lash out, I didn't put the last line actually meaning it.
>>7144>Maybe I only talk about boring stuff, usually science or history-related things? And a lot of the time music as well. You know a lot of people will humor you talking endlessly indepth about random bullshit just to be polite or because they want something else from you. Actually you probably don't because you're autistic. Some funny meme I saw before about autistic guys reciting trivia like they're that guy from the book of Eli who memorized the bible. But yeah autismos do this a lot.
DON'T Stop monologuing. Stop even pseudo-dialoging where the other person is just way more sociable and just humoring you. Find some topic you both are actually interested in or at least talk about personal things than random bullshit. Asking questions is even better.
> It happened once with a guy but on our date (literally the first date I've ever been on) I realized he was a lot farther along on the autism spectrum than me and I just stopped liking him after thatSo you're just waiting for the guy who's the right blend of autism or some non autistic guy that wants to put up with you for some reason?
I was just fucking around about the onlyfans thing.
>>7146Sorry I'm usually really good at sarcasm but when it comes to dating or fat people as you can see in this thread I get kinda hyper-sensitive
>>7147Ok this seems like good advice. I don't want to date another autist I hate my disorder if I have kids and they inherit it I'll never forgive myself
>>7148I mean these are all rough requirements tbh, the main one is just do not be fat, boring, or look like steve buscemi, the guys I talked about earlier who ghosted me didn't meet all of the things you've put here and I'm pretty sure they thought I was normal until I said the wrong thing and they could sense the autism
>>7149>womenYou mean "thin women". Most overweight/obese women will date you I wouldn't give up over my ridiculous eating disorder/mental health issues. But I also think most thin women won't date a fatter guy, it's the same in reverse except in areas where women outnumber men or men outnumber women and people of the opposite sex are more desperate than usual, it's just life unfortunately, we have to improve ourselves first
>>7150The only true criteria is "don't broke", even well-off fat guys can score good.
>inb4 those are trophy wives, not true bonding hurr durrThen it's to judgement who's using who: the fat bastard or the broke slut.
>>7151>Ok this seems like good advice.To elaborate for you more. Talk about your past, present, future etc. Anecdotes, personal information, is how someone becomes a fixed entity in your mind. It's way more interesting too imo, why would I want to hear something I could just read in a book or an article by myself, but your lived experience is something that can only be got from you. Then being good at asking your questions and also being, consoling, supportive, etc. will make people like you. Like if someone told you they had this big test or project coming up they were stressing about and you just give them old ganbatte, it will make them happier and also like you more.
>>7151>the main one is just do not be fat, boring, or look like steve buscemiYou will claim this and then straight faced tell me you don't like
>>7143 who is above average, so it's not "people who look like Steve bucemi" don't kid yourself
>>7161Bill Hicks is a pretentious mancunt.
Always whining abput how America is emasculated ust because people dont act like outlaws from cpuntry and western movies.
He unironically wouldve been the face of the alt right movement had he lived another two decades.
Speakimg of which, theres a conspiracy theory saying that Bill Hicks is Alex Jones >>7150Incels: women play the dating game on easy mode
Girl: Umm actually, *makes a bunch of points that support the incels points*.
I love dating advice from women.
>>7070If men could just have the privilege of fucking anyone, then most men would be more interested in serious relationships.
In an individual approach to deal with this, maybe put in your bio:
"
TRADE DEAL
I recieve: three lovely dates
You recieve: one sex (after the dates)
"
>>7165Yeah, with the best advice from the thread being in the op, and also an inclusion of the thinking process of each sex/situation.
With that autistic femanon, she highlighted a fair point of thinking, which is:
>chicks follow XYZ standard so it makes sense they'd date someone with standards they want<Doesn't change the fact that those who meet the standard struggle to date or standards being extremely hard to reach like women just think men can just magically be financially doing wellor
>Women want to know the person before even considering sex<despite women being """""""just as""""""" horny as menplus various other stuff
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