just call them. We live in a society, if it were semi-functional, there would be programs were they take you first class to a beach resort/mental facility. Society has failed you, not the other way around.
Either way, you are improperly finding justification for your death, when you should instead be looking for ways to get out of the thread you feel daily. Consider dropping out of society. If you're american and have some money, you might be able to afford living for some time in thailand for example. Try volunteering. You're not a bad person, but your brain is afflicted with capitalist dread. It would be a mistake to find it "intellectual" justifications.
Either way, I feel you won't listen to me. Do yourself a favor and believe me that what you are feeling is not normal and you can get out of it, even if it feels impossible.