>>32I completely understand the kind of trans self-hate and idealisation of violence against oneself, I still experience these kinds of thoughts all the time. But why just live with it when you can channel such self-hate into revolutionary energy? Instead of just fantasising about someone beating you to death or holding you as a sex slave, why don't you commit to the path of a revolutionary, who will be the focus of intense violence and will probably die violently. Self esteem will be a non-issue compared to your responsibilities to the revolution, and it will be forced on you either way when you make speeches and need to be confident even if you don't want to. It's the ultimate boyremoval, you can't boymode when you are a political figure. So what's the point in wanting to be a fat man's pet before being shot in the head once you are old, when you could die young anyway in a revolution?