Sowwy jannies, I just need to vent.
My theymab older brother always gets away with it and I'm honestly shocked. You think one of his transgressions would catch up to him but no. First he sexually assaults me countless times over 2 years, then tries to do it to my sister (and fails from what I know), then he convinces my parents to deny me hrt when I was a minor and then finally he attempts to molest the sister of one of his childhood friends. *Also, he probably grooms repressing trans men into not transitioning (from what I know). All of this is typical rapist cishet male behaviour, but done under the veneer of being "nonbinary" and "queer".
When it comes to how often he raped me, I dont know the true number as it was simply that many "sessions", but I can give an estimate. If we say that it was weekly and there are about 50 weeks in a year, then it would amount to 50 times a year; we then double it to account for two years between the ages of 5 and 7 for a final value of 100 times. Now this is a very conservative estimate, if we say biweekly, then it would ammount to 100 times per year for a total value of 200 times. A close estimate is probably far less conservative than these values, its probably close to 400 - 600 times, as it was usually every other day, with several rapes happening in a single day. For more anecdotal and less rigorous evidence of his crimes; he would usually say very rapey things while raping me, a couple I remember are: "you know you want it" and "when we are old men in our 40s we will laugh at this", these lines often will ring through my head at my worst moments.
Now when he tried to do it to my sister, my sister eventually reported it, well the best a 5 year old child could report it. My sister was most likely spared from his crimes as she had a separate room and was also a cis girl (typically my parents really only care about rape or violence or threats of it when it comes to her but not to me).
When my parents learned of this when I was 7, they shamed me and removed my brother of all guilt, letting him off the hook. He stopped raping me, started to be my "friend" and I was supposed to never talk about it ever again. Eventually after living with him in the same house for another decade I simply broke and couldnt take it anymore; I reported it to my parents. My parents seemed to have completely forgetten what happened, they separated me but not him from the rest of the family. I went to live with m
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