Ranking Justice League episodes because its 3 am and I wanna do something for fun after working on my coursework for all evening. Not doing Unlimited because the first two seasons are my childhood nostalgia but Unlimited is not.
Worst story - The Savage Time. This episode features WW2 and does not even once (!) mentions (!) Soviet Union. The burger "We wuz Nazi beaters!" self-fellating at its most egregious. Sucks this has to be the story that introduces Vandal Savage in DCAU.
23rd place - Fury. This story really wants to say something about gender and feminism… but, of course, turns out to be a complete worhless nothingburger that fails to even have a proper climatic battle.
22nd place - Secret Origins. A… passable pilot for the series, even though it visibly takes a massive dip towards mediocrity after the end of the first part.
21st place - Hearts and Minds. Too much sexual subtext for the children's show, period. The action is horrible and the setting is too big for the generic "villain of the week episode" (ironically, this is one story that probably could have worked better as a three-parter) Also is it just me, or are villains Islamophobic caricatures?
20th place - Secret Society. A typical "teamwork good" story, executed rather poorly. Most of the action in there looked like a circus show for me (though there were a couple of awesome moments). And did they really just… killed poor Clayface like that?
19th place - Metamorposis. It is a fun story, but what ruins it is a jarring fact that so much time is put into building Metamorpho's character that the only real way to justify it would be to add him as a League member at the end… and yet we never see him again until Unlimited.
18th place - Legends. Easily the most overrated DCAU story. Largely this story is just early 2000s capeshit writers jerking off to Silver Age capeshit writers… which has almost zero value to viewers outside of BurgerLand. Oh, and the Soviets are implicitly the real main villains in this.
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